Relationships are the currency of the wealthy.
The wealthy make a daily habit of forging relationships with powerful influencers. They build these “Power Relationships” by following certain rules that I uncovered in my Rich Habits Study:
Hello Calls, Happy Birthday Calls and Life Event Calls
- Hello Calls – These are “Reconnaissance” calls. By that, I mean, they are phone calls you make in order to gather information about each Influencer. The more you know about your Influencer, the more opportunities you will have to build stronger connections with them.:
- Birthday of Influencer and Family Members
- Names of Family Members
- Schools Attended by Influencer and Family Members
- Other Influencers They Have Strong Relationships With
- Personal History – Where They Grew Up, Parents Background, Siblings, Etc.
- Happy Birthday Calls – These annual calls have one important function – they keep your relationship with your Influencer on life support. According to my Rich Habits Study data, after a few years, about 25% of these Influencers will reciprocate and call you on your birthday. This takes the relationship off life support and opens the door to making Hello Calls and eventually, Life Event Calls.
- Life Event Calls – These are the most important calls you make. Because they are “Emotional-Calls”, they put your Influencer relationship on steroids. The roots to your relationship grow deep and fast, with Life Event Calls. You make Life Event Calls whenever something good or bad happens to one of your Influencers:
- Family Deaths/Births
- Promotions/Job Change
- Family Accomplishments – Career Awards, Child Athletic Awards, Media Exposure, Etc.
- Ilness/Illness Recovery
- Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, First Holy Communions, Graduations
- New Home Purchase
- New Business
- College Acceptance
During physical meetings with Influencers, make sure to look them in the eye. But don’t overdo it. Keep your gaze fixed for no more than 5 seconds at a time, then divert your glance for another 5 seconds. More than 5 second eye contact may make certain individuals uncomfortable. Practice will turn this into a habit.
Be Careful What You Say
Not every thought that comes into your head should come out of your mouth. Vet your thoughts. Speaking your mind does not mean sharing every thought. Some thoughts are not appropriate and could cause irreparable damage to your relationships.
Never Criticize, Condemn or Complain
Don’t talk ill of anyone. If you do, your Influencer will assume you will talk negatively about them. Say only constructive, positive things about others and your Influencer will assume you will say only constructive, positive things about them.
Be Positive & Upbeat
Influencers are Influencers because they have had some level of success in their lives. Successful people are, by nature, optimistic, upbeat and have a positive outlook on life. They do not allow negative people into their inner circle. Stay positive and get out of the habit of negativity.
Successful people do not engage in negative gossip and they avoid people who do. Engage in only positive gossip – saying nice things about others. Influencers will assume that when you talk behind their backs, you will say only positively about them.
If you have specific, unique knowledge or skills, offer to help your target Influencer with your knowledge/skills. Give first. Generosity builds trust and respect. But, not only that, sharing your unique knowledge/skills can act like a dress rehearsal, showcasing your unique abilities.
Ask For Help
If an Influencer can help you, ask them for help. In their mind, you will become a relationship debtor, and this means your Influencer may likely call upon you for help in the future. Relationships grow only through constant contact and this increases the likelihood of future contact.